I had my attention drawn to the "i love babywise" facebook page by the awesome chick behind woman uncensored. WTF!! that's all that came to mind whilst reading some of the posts on the discussion board.....are some of these so called mothers insane!! Although i would never claim to be the perfect mother by any stretch of the imagination, the intentions and actions expressed here are cruel and sound like things inflicted on POW's!
let me just share with you some of the comments and then my thoughts on them.
"we have been doing baby wise for about a week now (so my son started at 10 weeks). i know it takes some time but he is really hating his naps! he sleeps excellent through the night but nap time is a whole other story. he will usually only sleep for 30-45 minutes so the other 45minutes to an hour is spent with him screaming. what are we doing wrong? he is on a 3 hour schedule, should it be longer at this point? is he getting too many naps during the day or is it just because we are starting out on it so late? i feel like he should be doing better by now with his naps."
some babies are just cat nappers!! the kid is 10 weeks old, hes still very new to this world and he is sleeping well during the night....stop whinging. My giggle girl was the same but we got 20min sleeps, i figured it was a trade off for her doing so well at night......and this was when she was much older than 10 weeks.....at 10 weeks we were still co bedding and feeding by boob on demand. why would you want to hear your child scream for 45 mins if you don't have to??
"I am really struggling with disciplining my son. He is 18 months, very intelligent, and very strong willed. I have tried saying no, doing time outs, spanking and half the time he laughs at me or ignores me. I always knew as a mom this would be my weak point, but it is made especially clear since he is strong willed.
What consequences has anyone tried that are effective, especially with a strong willed child?"
As someone who has a 19 month old VERY independent giggle girl, smacking isn't going to help.....i van tell you now. HOW ABOUT YOU TRY TALKING! All smacking does is teach them that violence is ok!
If i explain to her what shes doing and why its not safe to do she listens almost 90% of the time.....the other 10% of the time i put my big girl panties on, act like a mum and REMOVE her from the situation and go find something more fun for us to do TOGETHER!
"Hey people, I'm so thankful that I found this site! I need help too!
1. Like Ruth, my baby is not yet sleeping through the night at almost 9 weeks old. She's been on a 3-hr schedule beginning at 7am each day since 3 wks old.
2. Also, she typically wakes only at 3am to eat, then 5am to fuss, but both times goes right back to sleep after a little soothing from us. Sometimes, she also wakes around 12 or 1 and is wide awake. I don't know why!
Help help o help.
We did Baby Whisperer with our first child, our son. It is quite similar. I thought she would be easier, but she's not. She screams whenever she's awake and not held."
THE BABY IS 9 WEEKS OLD! they are not supposed to sleep though the night! shes waking because she is hungry and wants comfort from her mum! don't punish her for that by dumping her in a room alone! IDIOT!
I think some of these mothers need a good smack around the head themselves and to parent according to their own child's wants and needs rather than what a book says.
I also think what they are whinging about isn't that bad at all.
I'm going to tell you about a friend of mine.
she has two kids. the eldest is 2.5 and the youngest is 3 0r 4 months old. she suffers from PND and over the past few moths has had more crap happen to her than anyone deserves! But in the past WEEK her youngest has been constipated and has colic, she has a uterine infection and her eldest is being a HUGE terror which is unusual and they cant work out why. Her partner is very supportive luckily and i know that things will work out in the end but this wonderful mother deserves a medal for all the things she is dealing with. These baby wise whingers wouldn't last a day in her shoes!
Babywise to me seems like dog training manuals, all about convenience to the owner.
THEY ARE A PERSON! a baby not a puppy!
when you have a baby you should be aware that your life changes...you miss out on sleep, your social life changes and you cant just pop the kid out and get back to your old life with a cute (QUIET) fashion accessory in a pram.
And even with all the changes you make to be a mummy...i love it and would never give up my new fun exciting funny life for all the sleep in the world!
Love and Smiles
Z.
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5 comments:
Agreed!!
I love your responses! Geez, how are these people allowed to have kids? That is scary how so many ignorant people have no idea how to comfort a baby...if it's crying PICK IT UP AND CO SLEEP. Unless you are drunk or high or on sleep medication, or morbidly obese and take common sense safety precautions (like not using tons of covers and pillows-or use a side carrier if you must), just co sleep! Any article in the paper where a baby was smothered by 'co sleeping', there was always drugs or alcohol involved!
I used this book as a resource when I had my son almost 3 years ago now. It was very helpful. I think the people commenting are taking it too seriously. It is not an operating manual, but rather a guide. Maternal instinct irons out any issues that one might have, but new moms can be unsure of themselves and that is where they seem to be coming from.
I suggest to anyone criticising the book to actually read it yourself. It is not about being a nazi, but rather offers helpful advice on helping your child develop a schedule, which is helpful to all parties involved. You are entitled to your own opinion, but I personally used this book with great success. It doesn't talk about spanking in this book either, not quite sure where that question tied into Baby Wise...
The above comment just doesn't get it. I hate it when parents say, well it worked for me and my kid, i heard it doesn't work for some people, but it worked fine for me. sigh. what about all the kids who were tortured by their clueless parents? What about the lawsuits against the authors and the publishing companies? What about the fact that all breastfeeding sites rail against this book as a quick way to dry up your milk and even have a "failure to thrive"?
My child would have screamed his head off for 2 hours if I only fed him every 3 hours - he was a cluster feeder and hungry all the time - he could never have lasted on any type of feeding schedule. Sometimes I feel sorry for "good" babies that are so complacent they get ignored a lot - at least with high needs babies with good parents, they get held a lot and sung to constantly. :)
I used routines with both my children. I will never shake the guilt of letting them cry. I used to sit at the door and cry while I waited out the 5 more minutes that I was told was important to let them cry for. Even admitting that I did that to my children makes me cry and my eldest is nearly 6. It still upsets me. I would advise any parent to do what they have to. If that means carrying your child in a sling and sleeping with them, do it, it's always that right thing to do if you think it's the right thing to do. Routines are for people with pushy mother-in-laws. Hugs to all the parents out there that are stronger than me and do what they think is best for their babies.
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